How would you deal with an emotionally abusive parent?

Is there an adult you can talk to? You need counseling to deal with your Mom and learn to not internalize her toxicity. Because she is sick and taking her brokenness out on you. That is not your job in life. She sounds incredibly selfish, and now you are broken. Ugly cycle. You have alcoholism and emotional abuse. I hope a relative or other trusted adult in your life can help you heal, get a new healthy perspective and get some skills in coping with your parents.